New Job!!

I've had a few people ask me what he's been promoted to, so I thought I'd explain.

I'm so proud of Craig for getting his promotion and it's so very much deserved by someone that works as hard as he does.  I'm also proud of the work he does.  I should say first, that I think most peoples' jobs are contributions to the greater good in some way.  I say that to point out that I don't think you have to do expressly charitable work to enhance the good of your community.  That being said, Craig's job is especially beneficial to our community and to the people he serves and I'm always impressed with how much it changes lives.

He works for an organization called United Housing.  Their mission is to buy foreclosed homes, rehab them, and then resell them to low-income families at affordable prices.  That's just the bones of the operation, though.  What you have to know is that Memphis has a foreclosure rate that is much higher than most of the country, and always has, even before the housing bubble burst.  We live in a city with a very high number of its citizens living well below the poverty line.  The number of high school graduates is extremely low, and the unemployment rate is astronomical.  Obviously, this creates a vast number of problems, but one is that most of the population is financially illiterate, which leads to the huge numbers of foreclosures.  Unfortunately, there has also been a lot of predatory lending here.  United Housing is able to get individuals and families into nice, safe homes that have been equipped with new and working amenities that are their own.  They do this through federal and state grant money, as well through traditional fundraising. 

In order to qualify, the buyer must be below a certain income level, have two years of employment, and meet some credit requirements (these aren't nearly the same as the bank standards).  Then, they're required to go through a process of credit counseling and home buyer education for first time home owners.  United Housing has a variety of ways to help people finance their homes and has an incredible success rate with the families they've helped.  They're able to get people into their own homes who wouldn't otherwise qualify for a mortgage, at a reduced monthly payment and with an education on financial responsibility.  Not only do the families get the satisfaction of homeownership, but they also are getting improved neighborhoods.  Through their work, United Housing has changed the face of some areas of Memphis by moving families in that are responsible and take pride in their homes and by improving the curb appeal of so many neglected houses. 

Craig started with UH as an intern while he was still in grad school until he was hired on full-time.  His job to this point has been to administer a federal grant called the Neighborhood Stabilization Program, or NSP.  UH received $4 million dollars and it has been Craig's job to administer that grant money and oversee the purchase of the houses bought.  It's never been done in Memphis before through that program, and United Housing has become one of the national models for successful administration of this particular federal program.  Craig even published a manual on its administration and learned at a conference in D.C. that it's being used around the country by other housing non-profits. 

His recent promotion is equally unchartered territory for United Housing.  He's now the Development Director.  While he'll continue to administer the NSP grant through September, he's now stepped into a role that requires a lot more. He'll be responsible for all the fund raising, programs, and the continued development of UH in Memphis.  He's hoping to expand their capabilities significantly by securing corporate sponsorship.  His ideas would bring more money to UH to help more neighborhoods and would also get the name out more in the community to get even great local support.  He has some great plans for a possible partnership with a bank to mutually benefit the bank through mortgages, while receiving their support from advertisement, etc.  He has essentially written his own job description and is venturing out into brand new territory in the area.

One of the best things about his job is his close relationship with his boss.  They're really in sync and Craig has learned so much from him.  His boss is entrusting Craig with a huge responsibility with this promotion, but he obviously has the utmost confidence in him, and so do I. 

I know this was long, but what they do is hard describe in one sentence.  It's also only my description.  I hope it's all accurate!  Maybe Craig can leave a comment if there are any corrections that need to be made.  A sincere thank you to everyone who's congratulated him and us on this new job.  We're so very excited!

Monday

Today starts day one of three in my Bar prep program dedicated to Contracts and Sales--not one of my favorite subjects in law school, or life.  Instead of moping, I'll share what I'm grateful for this morning. 

A full fruit bowl makes me happy for several reasons, but mostly because it means the grocery shopping is done

A window to look out of while I study at the table

My favorite mug with tea...

and then the hard stuff to keep me going

Clean laundry and a clean house

Being able to see progess made and an end in sight

Shared spaces

Wishing everyone a happy and productive Monday!

Nice Little Saturday

     Many months ago (or ten) Craig and I got married.  My life has changed in more wonderful ways than I can count and my memories of our wedding are of the warmest and fuzziest variety, but that's not what this post is about.  This is about one of our wedding gifts.  I'll be honest, it was what got Craig through the parts of our engagement when all I was thinking about was color combinations and dress alterations.  The fact that we got gifts for getting married, something we were already excited about, and got to drink whiskey in front of our priest at the reception, well, that did it for him.  When I first explained to him what registering was he acted like we were gonna be in on the greatest scheme of all time before the rest of the world found out.  Every time we pass a Bed, Bath, and Beyond I remember daydreaming about flatware and bed linens as Craig wielded the scanner like a domesticated Jedi knight.  As an aside, I showed this to him before I published it to make sure he didn't mind my depiction of him. He couldn't have cared less about that, but he did insist that I capitalize Jedi because it was written incorrectly in lower case. Noted.

  

     The gift at the center of this post wasn't one that we registered for and isn't one of those things that I don't know how I ever lived without.  In fact, it's been living in the corner of the dining room behind a chest since the wedding.  The hibernation was definitely not by my choosing, though.  All through the fall and winter I would make comments about the ice cream maker and how good homemade ice cream is.  Gradually, I started talking about how much fun it would be to make some and how I was looking forward to trying it out.  By Spring I was pointing out the necessary ingredients as we passed them in the grocery store.  Last weekend I told Craig that we were making ice cream, damn it. I try not to be a pushy wife.  It's my preference and my intention for Craig to be the leader in our family.  He always weighs my opinion and concerns and makes the final call on all the important issues and that works for us.

Today, though, ice cream was made.

It begins on the stove

The world's tiniest sous-chef

Next step, the fridge (with adult supervision by Max)

The three hour wait

INTERMISSION

Craig and Max took a World Cup break during the freezing stage

Also during the freeze, Max got really quiet.  Now, when this happens it means that we've either forgotten that he's outside, OR he's found something on the floor or gotten into the cabinets.  I checked under the bed and the latter was definitely true.  Apparently, he had secreted away a bag of taco seasoning, his toy, and a sock under the bed.  Also, I guess he had been working on some craft projects because there was also a cardboard toilet paper roll shredded up.

His handiwork

RESUME PROGRAM

Delicious

He liked it too--the picture snapping all day, not so much.

So, it ended up being delicious.  Craig even said, "Good idea, Bug," which is a compliment, I promise. 

Nat King Cole Stay As Sweet As You Are

 This is one of my favorite happy songs.

Bar Blues

     Tonight I'm studying for the bar exam and obsessing over my percentage points, hoping to do well enough just to pass. Tonight Craig is working until nine o'clock (for a grand total of an 11 hour day) because he's taken a second job to support us while I study for the bar and obsess over my percentage points, hoping to do well enough just to pass. Repetitive--yes, but these are my thoughts for the next 59 days little while.  I'm grateful for all the people who've said they're sure I'll do fine.  I can only take a little comfort in that, though.  It's a hard test, harder than most others and smart people fail it all. the. time.  Granted, not so smart people also pass it.  The point is, there are people that work hard in law school and study just as hard for the bar and don't pass.
    Most of the time I've got a positive attitude and I believe in my ability to pass and blah blah blah, but this is my blog and I'll cry if I want to.  I hate that Craig is working more hours in a week than I can count without getting teary.  It's mostly today that's gotten me down.  I'm actually really proud of us both for working so hard.  I love how close we are because of all of this.  I feel sometimes like if you don't go through times like these in your marriage, you might be getting cheated because it's shown me how rock-solid we are. In fact, I think it's more normal than not to struggle at the outset.  BUT leaving aside all perspective and maturity, I will issue a preemptory warning apology:  if you talk to me about your fifteen vacations taken this year, or tell me that I just HAVE to try some new thing, or that we should make an impromptu plan for something that costs only $(insert whatever dollar amount) I may stick out my tongue at you.  I may even do a little wave under my chin to seal the deal.  I'm not mad at anyone and I am, in all seriousness, happy for anyone's success, I'm just feeling that childish at the moment.  In fact, I would love to see photos from your vacation and I do want to hear the pros and cons of a recent purchase and please, please, please allow me to take a rain check for the fun plans.  I plan on having some big fun when this is over and will be thrilled to receive the invite. Just not today (x 59).  I do, however, predict a swift and complete return to normalcy, relative though it may be. 

For Mother's Day

"A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world.  It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path."

-----Agatha Christie


I'm not a mother, so I can't speak to the truth of this sentiment from that end, but from the perspective of a daughter it feels right to me.  What a strange thing to grow up thinking that all your thoughts are your own, only to learn later that much of what felt groundbreaking, was ground already covered by your mother.   The slow revelation of a child to their parent is matched in complexity and sweetness only by the slow revelation of parent to child.  My mom was the first person I ever knew, and will be one of the few people that I can never truly know.  There are no secrets, only a cloud of a thousand points of connection that obscures a mother in a way that others aren't.  When I was a little girl and my mom would tell a story about something that happened before I was born I would ask her over and over, "But where was I?"  I could never understand how there was a time before I existed.  How could she, my mom, have been before I was?  I couldn't exist without her and it seemed unreal that she did, before there was a me. 

I've been blessed by a complicated, profoundly interested and interesting, funny, compassionate, and steely mother who has loved me enough to cover distances and troubles I couldn't conceive of as a kid.  I've been loved enough for a room of people.  When my dad died, she loved me enough for both of them.  When I've been weak and scared she's loved me into action.  When I've had my heart broken, she's loved me back together again.  The love of my mom will always carry me just a little further than I thought I could go. 

I've always adored my mom and told everyone who would listen how funny and smart she is and how my mom can do this, and make that, and knows how this thing and that works.  My mom can create a pot from clay she dug from the creek and paint it with homemade glaze. She can make straight As while working thirty six hours a weekends and being a single parent. She can grow and can the best green beans, recover from stuff that would make a weaker woman fall, and she can fix anything. She can stand up to anyone. She can knit, draw, crack a filthy joke, heal the sick, find anything online, and do the things that other people are afraid of, like moving to a new town and starting fresh.  She can get in the trenches with anyone, do voices for every pet we've ever had, learn to do everything she's ever tried to, and make someone feel like the most special creature on earth. 

She's always resisted this view of her that I hold and always maintained that she could've been a better mother and done this or that differently.  She's made it a point to never hide or deny her imperfections.  What I had, though, was space to succeed and fail and a fertile place for my imagination to grow.  I was allowed to be myself at every age and that, trust me, took patience.  Even when I've felt like I was grabbing at air trying to find my place, I know that I still have a place wherever she is. To me, there is no better mother than that.

To this day, there is no one that can comfort me like my mom or make me trust myself when things get a little hairy.  She has always told me to keep my chin up and it's become a mantra for my life.  It's how I face my fears and leap head first, even when I want to run.  People tell me sometimes that I'm strong or that I'm confident and I always think, I'm impersonating her.  What would mom do?  The old joke of turning into your mother is no joke here. I talk to myself, sing to my pets, dance in the kitchen, constantly fight the battle against being a pack rat, and rarely back down from a challenge. She'll never know, though, that no matter what I become I'll always strive to be a woman after her example.  No matter what, I'll always be her button.  I love you Mom!

Ed Zachary Syndrome

I'm not much of a practical joker because (a) I'm a baby and don't like having it done to me and (b) because I can't keep a straight face for anything.  Any surprises that I try to keep or secrets that are exciting show all over my face.  I'm always given away by smiling like an eight year old being sung to on their birthday.  Half embarassed, half-trying not to pop from excitement.  Needless to say, I rarely pull anything off and I'm inappropriately proud when I do.

The following story happened almost a year ago, but I still feel good about the fact that I actually pulled off a joke, rather than forgetting the punch line like usual or laughing too hard to get it out.  Craig was living in Memphis and  I was still in Jackson, so most of our chats were on the phone.  He was complaining about his foot hurting.  As a side note, we've since found out that he's got some legit issues there, but don't let that dampen your perspective because I'm not, dangit.  Anyway, I casually mentioned that he might be suffering from Ed Zachary Syndrome.  He wasn't familiar with the condition, so I said that maybe he should look it up online sometime.  Some how, the fact that the phone was between us kept me from blowing water through my nose at my little prank. 

I'm not saying it was the funniest joke, or even that clever, but the stars aligned just right for me to finally pull a prank. He complained, we were on the phone, and it was all just too right.

I am smiling as I type this because I still think its that funny.  If you don't see the humor, maybe you should see a doc.  You might have it too.